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July 14, 2009

Shows over, folks!


Yes its sadly true. Big river is over. I was astounded by all the support from my family and friends. So this is my review of my first role since high school.

Auditioning was awful. I've never been so critical of my voice or actions. I was so nervous and worried about how things would go. Afterward I was self conscious and shy. I knew I didn't do as well as I have before. or could have. I forgot some of the lyrics. I almost cried (granted it was a sad song)

I got the part I wanted. I was very excited, but I wanted a little reassurance. I didn't know if I really deserved the part. I felt that my acting was sub-par. but support from other cast members made me re-think.

The first Rehearsal was hard. I was more nervous than anything ever. I flubbed on my lines with the book right in front of me. I was shivering from my adrenalin and more worried about the director regretting her choice than anything. It took longer than necessary to memorize my 15 lines due to there being so few and i didn't have very much help. But I got them by tech week. Things got more relaxed and my nerves stilled.

Tech week I was a running mess. I was always late getting my hair, makeup, costume done. but i was there. I wasn't feeling great. I was so worried about getting sick I was obsessing. I didn't want the director to think I got sick before performances. That would suck.

For the show my nerves seemed to take a vacation. Every time before I went on there was a shadow of nerves but it was followed by feeling tired and sluggish. Weird, I know. But it got me through my scenes. My voice was strong and my lines were always there. I tried to act as best I could. I think my accent was all that got me through. But I had an awesome time. I did it. Maybe the nerves wont be so bad next time.

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